Radio Head"
by Miss Odious
Summary: Are you sure this wasn't a twilight zone episode? This play was produced at a local coffee shop and is about to be sent out for a hopefully bigger production. So please review and tell me what you think. This play is copyrighted 2000 C.Kreimendahl


"Radio Head"  
  
William Brundage…………..……..…….Effie's son  
Effie Brundage………….…William's Mother  


  
  


William sits at the kitchen table with his back tothe audience, He's intensely  
working on something that's not yet visible to us.There's knocking at the  
door. William doesn't budge. There's more knocking,louder this time.  


  
  
  
Effie:(Outside door) William! Open the door!  
  
  
  


William reluctantly gets up and opens the door for Effie. We see now that it's a 1960's  
model radio that he's been working on He never looksat her and Sits back down at the table,only in a different chair. We can see him now. Effieis carrying several bags of groceriesand struggling with them on her way into the kitchen.  


  
  
Effie:Shit, (Pause) Ohh I think something is leaking. (She puts the grocery bags downon   
the floor and inspects them) No, no it's justcondensation. Maybe I need to change   
with the times and start getting plastic instead  of paper. What do you think   
William?William? Are you listening? (Notices misplaced chair) Were you sittingin   
your father's chair?  
  
William:No.  
  
Effie:William the seat is still warm for Christ's sake. You know how I feel aboutlying.  
  
William:Well, it has the best light.  
  
Effie:  Of course the grass is always greener, isn'tit? That's your Father's chair, just   
because he's dead, God rest his soul, doesn't meanthat it's not still his chair. He   
would send you out for a switch if he knew what you were doing, and notto the   
little bush out front either. You know he hated that.  
  
William:I'm sorry Mom.  
  
Effie:(Putting away groceries) They raised all the prices at the grocery store.Ridiculous.   
Creamed corn, clam chowder...Wheaties, all my favorites. (Begins to hear music)   
Oh, this is a good one. Turn it up William. Mhhmm. Marvin Gay. Nowthat's a man.   
(Back to audience)  
  
William:(Angry) Mom, the radio isn't playing. Can't you see it's not even together.  
  
Effie:(Slams cans on the counter, back still to audience) You know I hate it when you   
say things like that.  
  
William:I'm sorry… I didn't mean it, really.  
  
Effie:Just look at my table. Now how am I going to have a normal family dinner onthis?  
  
William:We can sit in the living room, just like we have been.  
  
Effie:Aren't you just about sick to death of eating on T.V. trays?  
  
William:No. I like them, I get to watch my favorite T.V. show.  
  
Effie:Well, I'm tired of it. I want you to pick up all that junk on my table. We'regoing to   
sit down and eat dinner like normal people for once.Go on pick it up. Dinner is   
ready. I bought pre-cooked food. I thought I needed a break fromcooking.  
  
William:I'm sort of in the middle of something.  
  
Effie:You can get back to it after dinner.  
  
William:Let me just finish this.  
  
Effie:Dinner is ready!  
  
William:Just a second.  
  
Effie:Dinner is getting cold by the second.  
  
William:A few more things.  
  
Effie:William Brundage, if you don't pick up this junk, I'm going to pick it upmyself and   
you are not going  to like where I stick it!  
  
William:I'm almost done here.  
  
Effie:I refuse to eat cold chicken. William I told you , I'm on strike!  
  
William:Hang on.  
  
Effie:That's it (Throws pieces onto the floor)  
  
William:Mom! No! Wait! I'll pick…stop. I'll pick it up. Don't worry about it. It's nobig deal   
(Putting pieces in box) I'll get back toit after dinner. I'll just put this in my room   
out of the way (Goes for outside of radio)  
  
Effie:(Grabs his hand) Leave it. I like to listen to the radio while I eat. Helps medigest.  
  
William:Ok (Exits with box)  
  


Effie sets food on the table humming and dancing a bit. William enters.  


  
William:All cleaned up.  
  
Effie:I love music (William sits down) I think listening to the radio is my mostfavorite   
thing to do.  
  
William:This chicken is good.  
  
Effie:It's  ok. For pre-cooked. But my chickenis by far better. Nothin say's lovin like   
something from the oven.  
  
William:Amen.  
  
Effie:You're Father use to persuade me to cook for him by saying that.  
  
William:I remember.  
  
Effie:You know this radio wasn't working for the longest time. I'd say…oh six years.Your   
Father tried to fix it, sat right there in hischair, spent hours days, working on it.   
Eventually he gave up.   
  
Effie:But the strangest thing happened.         William: But the strangest thing happened.  
  
William:I know Mom.  
  
Effie:Hush let me remember. It was a beautiful day, cool breezes, bright blue   
sky.Everything was beaming. I felt like a kid all day.So I got a little nostalgic. I   
couldn't help but turn the knob, this beautiful music came out, soulful.I had   
forgotten how much I missed music. It lifted me right up off the ground. I was so   
happy all day,overflowing. Dancing around here (Pause) made a horrible mess.   
Then I got the call; they saidyour Father had died that afternoon, accident in the   
factory. They apologized about not calling sooner,said there was an investigation   
first to find out who the bodies belonged to, just bullshit you know.  
  
William:I remember.  
  
Effie:Good. You should remember your Father. He was a good man. Someone to look   
up to.  
  
William:I don't know about that.  
  
Effie:What do you mean?  
  
William:Well for starters, he just bossed you around all day.  
  
Effie:Don't be silly he did not. He had wonderful attributes; you would do good totake   
some of those Qualities.  
  
William: I can do that. Effie! Get me another beer! Effie! When's dinner? Are you tryinto   
starve me…!  
  
Effie:That's enough! I will not have you speaking ill of the dead. I don't know whereyou   
get this stuff.  
  
William:I'm full.  
  
Effie:It's like you lived on some other planet, with two totally different parents. (Picking   
up plates) Did you hear about the job yet?  
  
William:(Exiting to get box) Mom I just went for an interview yesterday. He said he'dcall   
in a few days. (Sits at kitchen table withbox)  
  
Effie: Did the interview go well?  
  
William: I guess so.  
  
Effie: You guess so? You mean you don't… (Effie starts to collapse)  
  
William: Mom? Are you ok?  
  
  
Effie: I think so. Yes, I'm fine. Just look at all these dirty dishes. You'd thinkthat there's   
a platoon of hungry men hiding in our closets,creeping out when  we're not looking   
and dirtying all my dishes.   
  
William:I'm almost done …I think.  
  
Effie:Good. I'm tired of that mess on my table. During my little adventure today Ibought   
you a newspaper at the grocery store.  
  
William:Oh, thanks. Anything good in it?  
  
Effie:  A thick employment section.  
  
William:Well I'm positive I got the job with Mr. Harris.  
  
Effie:Just in case, I think you should make some phone calls. I can't take care ofyou   
forever. (Long Pause) I need to sit down for aminute.  
  
William:You don't look so good.  
  
Effie:(Sitting in chair) Well, since they repoed your Father's car, I've been walking   
everywhere I go. carrying groceries for three mileswould wear out anyone. I just   
need to rest a bit. Why don't you take a look at the newspaper?  
  
William:I will later.  
  
Effie:Lot's of people read the newspaper at the kitchen table. My Father did, yoursdid. I   
use to love it when he did that. Always made methink of Norman Rockwell. I mean   
that's how life should be.  
  
William:What about this adventure of yours?  
  
Effie:It all started when I broke my heel. Good shoes too, the ones Uncle Al and Aunt   
Patty sent me for Christmas a few years back?  
  
William:Mom please, skip to the adventure. So negative.  
  
Effie:That's what I'm doing. The point is the whole day was an adventure. And, yesit's   
negative. Do you want to hear the story or not?  
  
William:Why were you wearing heels?  
  
Effie:I wanted to look nice in case I saw the girls from church.  
  
William:I don't know why you care so much what they think?  
  
Effie:You would if you knew what happened to me today.  
  
William:What happened?  
  
Effie:After I decided to break the other heel off , make it even. (William waves forher to   
continue) I ran into Greta. She asked me, in her very German, mean way, if Iwas   
going to attend the bake sale, and have some of her famous pecancookies. Can   
you believe the nerve? Well, I said yes and pretended, to be happy about eating her   
God-awful pecan  cookies for the tenthyear in a row...  
  
William: That is bad.  
  
Effie: She knows I always organize the bake sale, Nobody even told me about it.  
  
William:Ok! It's done. I hope it's done. Are you ready? Listen. (William turns theknob,   
nothing happens he turns it back and forth disappointed)  
  
Effie:Oh, it sounds wonderful. Mmm one of my favorites. I don't want to think aboutmy   
adventure anymore...get me a blanket William.  
  
William: (Sets radio down) Yes Ma'am.  
  
Effie: It's getting chilly. I need to have a serious talk with your Uncle aboutgetting his   
lazy butt down here and fixing that warn out old space heater.  
  
William:(Covering her up) It's suppose to get even colder over the weekend.  
  
Effie: Well...It's good for the blood. That's what my Grandmother Lucy use to say.  
  
William: I'm going to go out on the porch and smoke a cigarette. (William begins to exit)  
  
Effie: William bring the radio closer to me.  
  
William: Ok. (puts radio close to her)  
  
Effie: That's better. (William exits)  
  
William:(From outside) I just can't figure out what's wrong with it. I've triedeverything. You know Maybe I connected the wires allwrong. I had to replace nearly all of them, maybe I got it all wrong I was so sure it would (musicplays) work. (William rushes in) It's working! Maybe it just needed to warm up orsomething! Mom, look it's working, can you hear it? Can you hear it? Mom? (Shakes her) Mom, mom, wakeup! Oh God (feels her pulse) Oh no, mom? Mom? (He clutches the radio and falls toher feet)  
  


Lights out.  


  
  



End file.
